Step One Down

Next step:

Demo lesson.

Onwards and upwards.

grace and mercy.

I got this cuz God has me.

Let's go.

had a dream last night in two parts....

the first part, it was night time....i'm not sure if ron and i were yet married but i wanted to be close to him.  his room was still on the second floor of his house....the bottom however, was flooded...there were torrential rainstorms everywhere.....all that was left was an old couch for me to lay upon and wait for him to come down....i'm not sure if he came down or if i went up but we held each other....we were cold and naked...but we held each other....

the next part of my dream was at the funeral (that i did not attend on saturday).....someone one eulogizing him....i remember at first being in the audience....and then the pastor said "that's why we call up the prophets and pastors...."...and so all of the prophets and pastors got up out of the audience and came to the front.  and i walked up there with them....his mother was on the right of the casket being comforted by elder monica....pastor thomas got up and began praying in tongues...

then i look up and see sekou sitting in the casket....just looking at me....with those sekou mischevous eyes....

and then i woke up...

and then it was 4:57 (three minutes before i was supposed to get up and pray)...

and then i started praying.

YC

Ugh

That is all.

Quick to forgive...

That's what I am. In Jesus' name I claim it.

#longsufferthesaints

You said you would never leave me, nor would you forsake me.

Sigh.

I wont say I feel lonely...

But I do feel like the closest friend ive had all of my life isnt here to help me celebrate.

So I try to compensate and fill in the gap with other things and other people but the counterfeit just aint real.

I don't want to go corset shopping or shoe shopping by myself or with my.fiancee.

I want my best friend back.

Sigh.

there are many things that distinguish them from me.

many things that distinguish me from them.

raw talent must be honed.  and worked.  and harvested.  and groomed.  and developed.

so there are many things that distinguish me from them.

many things that distinguish them from me.

in other news...

we're moving close towards the wedding.  closer towards marriage.

resolved:  i will stay saved.  flesh been trying to act up lately.  i now know the meaning of flee.  i know that only the pure in heart shall see God...and that, above all, is my mission.  so Holy Ghost help me.

finished this 3 week Daniel fast.  brought out some foolishness in me....that's gotta go too.  but everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving i'm making my requests known to God and the peace that passeth understanding is guarding my heart and my mind in Christ Jesus.

we've resolved to postpone the house search and get an apartment for a year.  i'd rather not purchase a home that I marginally like or settle something simply because i feel rushed.  i did that with my car (which i really regret) and i don't want to do something like that with a larger price tag.  if we have to come home to it EVERY DAY...i'd like to enjoy what we've invested in....

i kind of feel like i'm biding time right now...waiting expectantly and patiently for the Lord to do what He said  He was going to do.

*fabulous*

i have an interview for the Network Community Engagement Manager position in less than two weeks.

help me Lord.

otherwise, things are moving along quite nicely.

YC

it's almost monday...

which means 

it's almost april 15th...

which means....

that in about 7 days, we will be 2 months away....

the needs are already met...exceedingly and abundantly above all that i can ask or think according to the power that's working in me.

in Jesus' name.

amen.

goodnight.

YC