right now i have about 15 windows open on my laptop.
this does not include the 15 windows open in my head.
i have a whole lot going on but nothing is getting accomplished right now. i don't think i've eaten today and i surely haven't drank anything. that may be why my head hurts.
i have no idea what to charge. i've been going over these numbers for a while now and i know there will be many people who think i'm too expensive. they are not my target client. shoot...i am not my target client and that's fine.
i don't want to compromise my vision. i am striving to be a a high end, boutique brand. i have the slight feeling that my target market is off. girls in Philadelphia want to look high end...not sure if they are willing to pay for it though. people buy what they value. hands down...i don't want to photograph everybody and their mama. i don't have the time or the patience. everyone doesn't necessarily see what i see. and that's ok.
i'm not really sure what to do next. taking a mental break and going to view a cheap but seemingly cute venue for my recruitment meetings. i'm supposed to host these meetings in February, but i don't have a location locked down. i'd rather not host them at my house...nothing says hi-end or value like trash on the street or hoodrats placing empty juice bottles on your car.
help me Holy Spirit. i need ALOT of your help today.
it's challenging. it's a good challenge, but it's challenging nonetheless.
hmmm.
16 January 2015
Some mornings I feel like giving up...and I just got started. Maybe it's just my season to be somebody's mommy. Like...everything in me wants to stop.
No person to turn to because they will judge me. I turn to God and tell Him I want to stop. I want to give up. I don't even know some days what I'm working for. I feel at a standstill. No one cares about this. Everyone thinks I'm crazy.
He says, "I know what I told you. You know what I told you."
God...this is hard.
He gives grace to the humble. Therefore, humble yourself under the mighty hand of God.
Ok.
No person to turn to because they will judge me. I turn to God and tell Him I want to stop. I want to give up. I don't even know some days what I'm working for. I feel at a standstill. No one cares about this. Everyone thinks I'm crazy.
He says, "I know what I told you. You know what I told you."
God...this is hard.
He gives grace to the humble. Therefore, humble yourself under the mighty hand of God.
Ok.
14 January 2015
09 January 2015
I remember the first time I said "I love you" to my husband. Friday, November 4th, 2011. It is as cold outside but inside I we hot. Not in a bad way but in a way that radiated throughout my body. It's almost if I didn't say it, I would explode. By this time, I'd know him for five years. In that time, I had never told him those words. Maybe I was scared. Maybe I wasn't ready for the totality of what they meant. I think I didn't really know what love was.
I told a friend the story of my husband and my journey to now. I always get so smitten when I think about how we went from puppy love to this. It's beautiful and amazing.
9 years after we met, I am in awe that this man is mine. We are not the same people we were when we met. I am sure we will evolve during the next decades together. I just pray that we grow in love together and that God allows us to enjoy each other for many more years to come.
My husband makes it better and I hope I do the same for him. There is nobody else for me.
01 January 2015
2015...write the vision and make it plain.
Let the refining and improving of your own life keep you so busy that you have little time to criticize others.-- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
They're not resolutions...just things I'd like to accomplish in 2015.
Personal (in no special order)
1. Develop and maintain a consistent daily devotional life. Through the good times and the I-want-to-flip-out-and-throw-some-stuff-at-somebody times. This includes quiet time with God, praying, reading and meditating upon His Word, worshipping and listening to the voice of the Holy Spirit.
2. Practice healthier living habits--eating and exercise. Even if my husband chooses the double whopper with cheese and bacon and I'm oh-so-tempted to indulge as well, I have to do what's right for my body and my health. 30 minutes of exercise, three times a week.
3. Commit to intentionally doing things to make my husband feel special.
4. Nurture my child by spending a set amount of time with her every single day to nurture her appropriately.
5. Win souls for Jesus Christ. Nuff said. I have never done it. My testimonies and intercessions have always been for those who already know Him. What about those who don't? The whole world is groaning and travailing...awaiting the manifestations of the sons of God. just saying....there's no time like the present.
6. Travel out of PA (and I'm not talking to the DMV) at least three times.
7. Shoot generations of women (daughters, mothers, grandmothers, etc.) and document their stories via photo and video to publish on my personal blog. I intend for these shoots to kindle my creativity and build my glamour and fine art portfolio should I choose to launch that portion of my brand next year.
8. Begin some sort of tradition that involves celebration, laughter, food, family, and friends!
9. Complete the our bedroom and dining room.
10. Read ALL of the books of the Bible chronologically.
11. Read 6 books.
Business
1. Develop and implement a senior model program with 15 members of the class of 2016 representing the In The Image brand. These young women will be college-bound, articulate, driven, goal-oriented, and committed to servicing their communities. They will also represent a number of different types of schools in the Philadelphia metro region.
2. Travel with my senior models to New Orleans, Louisiana to recreate the Solange white wedding shoot.
3. Purchase new gear including: (1) D750 full frame camera (2) Nikon Nikkor AF-S 85 mm F/1.4 G (3) Nikon Nikkor AF-S 24-70 mm F/2.8 G (4) a brand stinkin' new laptop for that can handle photo and video editing!!!!!
4. Shoot and sell at least 30 senior sessions before the year is over with an average of $1,000 in sales per session.
5. Build a rock-solid and consistent brand for modern high school senior photography.
6. Join a group of like-minded creatives who push me to think outside of the box and reach my full potential.
7. Purchase a seat at Amanda Holloway's Kitchen Sink Workshop in 2016!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Like...I REALLY WANT THIS! Please and THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!
8. Submit 4 shoots for national magazine publication
9. Shift from shoot and burn to in-person sales
10. Organize the basement as a set room for makeup AND in-person sales.
They're not resolutions...just things I'd like to accomplish in 2015.
Personal (in no special order)
1. Develop and maintain a consistent daily devotional life. Through the good times and the I-want-to-flip-out-and-throw-some-stuff-at-somebody times. This includes quiet time with God, praying, reading and meditating upon His Word, worshipping and listening to the voice of the Holy Spirit.
2. Practice healthier living habits--eating and exercise. Even if my husband chooses the double whopper with cheese and bacon and I'm oh-so-tempted to indulge as well, I have to do what's right for my body and my health. 30 minutes of exercise, three times a week.
3. Commit to intentionally doing things to make my husband feel special.
4. Nurture my child by spending a set amount of time with her every single day to nurture her appropriately.
5. Win souls for Jesus Christ. Nuff said. I have never done it. My testimonies and intercessions have always been for those who already know Him. What about those who don't? The whole world is groaning and travailing...awaiting the manifestations of the sons of God. just saying....there's no time like the present.
6. Travel out of PA (and I'm not talking to the DMV) at least three times.
7. Shoot generations of women (daughters, mothers, grandmothers, etc.) and document their stories via photo and video to publish on my personal blog. I intend for these shoots to kindle my creativity and build my glamour and fine art portfolio should I choose to launch that portion of my brand next year.
8. Begin some sort of tradition that involves celebration, laughter, food, family, and friends!
9. Complete the our bedroom and dining room.
10. Read ALL of the books of the Bible chronologically.
11. Read 6 books.
Business
1. Develop and implement a senior model program with 15 members of the class of 2016 representing the In The Image brand. These young women will be college-bound, articulate, driven, goal-oriented, and committed to servicing their communities. They will also represent a number of different types of schools in the Philadelphia metro region.
2. Travel with my senior models to New Orleans, Louisiana to recreate the Solange white wedding shoot.
3. Purchase new gear including: (1) D750 full frame camera (2) Nikon Nikkor AF-S 85 mm F/1.4 G (3) Nikon Nikkor AF-S 24-70 mm F/2.8 G (4) a brand stinkin' new laptop for that can handle photo and video editing!!!!!
4. Shoot and sell at least 30 senior sessions before the year is over with an average of $1,000 in sales per session.
5. Build a rock-solid and consistent brand for modern high school senior photography.
6. Join a group of like-minded creatives who push me to think outside of the box and reach my full potential.
7. Purchase a seat at Amanda Holloway's Kitchen Sink Workshop in 2016!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Like...I REALLY WANT THIS! Please and THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!
8. Submit 4 shoots for national magazine publication
9. Shift from shoot and burn to in-person sales
10. Organize the basement as a set room for makeup AND in-person sales.
First day of this year and first few hours. Praise God from whom all blessings flow, even the ones we least expect.
In 2014, I completed my first year of marriage, carried and delivered our first child, and left my job behind to become a full time mother and business owner. I cried (a lot) only because I was fearful. I was fearful because I had been angry with God for a very long time and hadn't acknowledged it. I had been angry with God because I was still holding on to this idea of what I thought my life should be, instead of allowing Him to lead me and guide me into something way better.
As I begin 2015, I declare a lot less crying, no fear. Taking responsibility for my actions while letting God work on my heart. Bind my mind to Your will, Lord. Make th desires of my heart pure and only ones that when brought to fruition, glorify you. I thank you and praise you for all that you have done and all that you are doing in me as a woman of faith in Jesus Christ. Help me to be the woman you have called me to be- multifaceted and dynamic, upright, full of integrity and a witness for Jesus Christ. Help me not to be ashamed of the Gospel for it is the power of God. Let not only my life be a reflection of you but let me not be ashamed to open up my mouth and delare your great works in my life. Help me to be unselfish and think about and pray for others. You have called me to intercession because I see things that other people don't see. People naturally confide in me, even when I don't ask, they tell me everything. People pour out their hearts to me. Help me to unload their burdens by praying for them. In this New Year, teach my how to pray with fervor and focus, boldly. Not with cadences in my voice and for emotional effect but with clarity because the effectual fervent prayer of the righteous availeth much. God help me to be righteous in you. Teach me your word. Teach me your ways. Write your law upon my heart. As I meditate upon your word day and night, stabilize my mind so that it is set on you. Let your word be the automatic response to every situation, good and bad.
I'm going into 2015 with my hands open. I give you all of my thoughts, plans, desires, challenges, wins, questions, hangups, shortcomings, victories, my husband, my marriage, my child, my business, my ministry, my gifts--everything. My hands are open not only to give, but I am also ready to receive all that you have in store for me. You are Jehovah Perrezim, Lors of the Breakthrough. I declare that this year, by faith, I and my household are breaking forth and enlarging the borders of our tent. We are stretching out on the right and the left, making room for more, prepared for the grace of God to be bestowed upon us in a mighty way that we would display your glory. Let there be no lack in our household whatsoever. Continue to protect and keep us safe. Continue to mold us and conform us to your image and likeness that our lives would glorify your son Jesus Christ. God, strengthen my marriage. Help me to cherish and respect my husband. He is the spiritual cover and provider for this household. Help me to pray for my husband as I know him more intimately than any other human in this world. Where he needs help, show me how to pray and how I can assist him. Continue to strengthen him physically and spiritually. I pray that he be well and in good health even as his soul prospers. I pray that he have the peace that psssseth understanding and that you continue to give him your infinite wisdom in all matters. I pray for my daughter. Keep her in grey health that she would develop and grow without sickness or disease. I pray that she be intelligent and quick and apt to learn. Give me the wisdom to teach her as I am her first and primary teacher, her first example of how to live.
Purge me of all that is not like you--fear, pride, selfishness, the love of money, the love of this world. Make me like you. Give me th grace to suffer with you so that I can reign with you in this life and in the life to come. Take me back to my child-like faith when I first believed. Pour into me that I may live a life poured out to others. Let me not be so selfish that I miss your purpose and plan for my life. A life of servanthood, that others might know Christ's love for them through me. Help me to be a vessel of honor fitted for your divine use. Fill me up so you can pour me out. Lead me to those who are dry and thirsty for you. They may not know why they are depleted, but help me to discern and to give the word of wisdom, the word of knowledge, and importation of my faith. I have the faith to work miracles. You told me so. You told me so. Let my miracle working faith be in operation this year.
God, I thank you for a new year, new beginnings, new mercy, your steadfast love, and that I can be honest before you. I anticipate so much greater in this year to come.
I love you and I praise you. Thank you!!!! Hallelujah!!!!
Your daughter--
Yvonne
In 2014, I completed my first year of marriage, carried and delivered our first child, and left my job behind to become a full time mother and business owner. I cried (a lot) only because I was fearful. I was fearful because I had been angry with God for a very long time and hadn't acknowledged it. I had been angry with God because I was still holding on to this idea of what I thought my life should be, instead of allowing Him to lead me and guide me into something way better.
As I begin 2015, I declare a lot less crying, no fear. Taking responsibility for my actions while letting God work on my heart. Bind my mind to Your will, Lord. Make th desires of my heart pure and only ones that when brought to fruition, glorify you. I thank you and praise you for all that you have done and all that you are doing in me as a woman of faith in Jesus Christ. Help me to be the woman you have called me to be- multifaceted and dynamic, upright, full of integrity and a witness for Jesus Christ. Help me not to be ashamed of the Gospel for it is the power of God. Let not only my life be a reflection of you but let me not be ashamed to open up my mouth and delare your great works in my life. Help me to be unselfish and think about and pray for others. You have called me to intercession because I see things that other people don't see. People naturally confide in me, even when I don't ask, they tell me everything. People pour out their hearts to me. Help me to unload their burdens by praying for them. In this New Year, teach my how to pray with fervor and focus, boldly. Not with cadences in my voice and for emotional effect but with clarity because the effectual fervent prayer of the righteous availeth much. God help me to be righteous in you. Teach me your word. Teach me your ways. Write your law upon my heart. As I meditate upon your word day and night, stabilize my mind so that it is set on you. Let your word be the automatic response to every situation, good and bad.
I'm going into 2015 with my hands open. I give you all of my thoughts, plans, desires, challenges, wins, questions, hangups, shortcomings, victories, my husband, my marriage, my child, my business, my ministry, my gifts--everything. My hands are open not only to give, but I am also ready to receive all that you have in store for me. You are Jehovah Perrezim, Lors of the Breakthrough. I declare that this year, by faith, I and my household are breaking forth and enlarging the borders of our tent. We are stretching out on the right and the left, making room for more, prepared for the grace of God to be bestowed upon us in a mighty way that we would display your glory. Let there be no lack in our household whatsoever. Continue to protect and keep us safe. Continue to mold us and conform us to your image and likeness that our lives would glorify your son Jesus Christ. God, strengthen my marriage. Help me to cherish and respect my husband. He is the spiritual cover and provider for this household. Help me to pray for my husband as I know him more intimately than any other human in this world. Where he needs help, show me how to pray and how I can assist him. Continue to strengthen him physically and spiritually. I pray that he be well and in good health even as his soul prospers. I pray that he have the peace that psssseth understanding and that you continue to give him your infinite wisdom in all matters. I pray for my daughter. Keep her in grey health that she would develop and grow without sickness or disease. I pray that she be intelligent and quick and apt to learn. Give me the wisdom to teach her as I am her first and primary teacher, her first example of how to live.
Purge me of all that is not like you--fear, pride, selfishness, the love of money, the love of this world. Make me like you. Give me th grace to suffer with you so that I can reign with you in this life and in the life to come. Take me back to my child-like faith when I first believed. Pour into me that I may live a life poured out to others. Let me not be so selfish that I miss your purpose and plan for my life. A life of servanthood, that others might know Christ's love for them through me. Help me to be a vessel of honor fitted for your divine use. Fill me up so you can pour me out. Lead me to those who are dry and thirsty for you. They may not know why they are depleted, but help me to discern and to give the word of wisdom, the word of knowledge, and importation of my faith. I have the faith to work miracles. You told me so. You told me so. Let my miracle working faith be in operation this year.
God, I thank you for a new year, new beginnings, new mercy, your steadfast love, and that I can be honest before you. I anticipate so much greater in this year to come.
I love you and I praise you. Thank you!!!! Hallelujah!!!!
Your daughter--
Yvonne
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