14 January 2012

a few things i've realized...

saturday evening. sitting on edge of my bathtub. smoking a djarum black....there are a few things i've realized....
  • i like the john coltrane pandora station WAYYYYYYYYY better than i like the thelonious monk station.
  • the john coltrane station would be wayyyyyyyyyy better if i was listening to it on a rainy sunday in a jazz cafe in paris.
  • i have absolutely, positively no idea what God wants me to do in my life.
  • i have been striving for years to become someone that i don't even like or feel comfortable being.
  • God sees my every move and is not afraid to provide chastisement and discipline.
  • i am at a major crossroads in my life and this is not a comfortable place to be.
  • i feel like i'm in labor and the baby is crowning. how uncomfortable is that?
  • i thought i was humble....apparently i'm not.
  • pride comes before the fall. humility comes before greatness.
  • everyone keeps calling me great, but i've never really accepted that calling for myself.
  • i thought the aforementioned was humility. apparently, it's something else.
  • God is real. Jesus is real. The Holy Spirit is real.
  • this is going to be one of the roughest and most rewarding seasons of my life.

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