amen.

first morning back.  spring break was altogether lovely.  very relaxing.  now it's back to the grind.

went home for a couple of days.  came back on wednesday and started looking for a couple of reception sites.  no bueno.  machumu told us about the Free Library of Philadelphia on the Parkway.  i took a look at the pictures and they have a rooftop deck which overlooks the city.  how LOVELY!  i guess we're taking planning one day at a time.  so many people have ideas.  so many people want to help. 

God, i need a clear vision...the money.  i'm a faithful tither.  i sow seed.  i will continue to do both. 

last week, i heard the Holy Spirit whisper in my ear, "Honor me and I will honor you"....

wow.

i had a dream last night.  i think i saw our child.  a girl.  she was walking in the lobby of the church.  it was summer time and she had on a blue and yellow short set.  around 3.  she had your eyebrows and smile.  a caramel colored complexion.  burnt caramel.  your eyes too.  she was happy. 

God grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change
courage to change the things i can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.

i'm slowly coming to terms with the fact that my 10+ year friendship with Dana is coming to an end.  Cynthia sent me a link to Dana's tumblr account.  she's been blogging for the past 8 months.....all entries are about louis....

life changes.  people changes.  i think i wanted to feel sad this morning and the Holy Spirit placed a song on my heart...."What a friend we have in Jesus".....when all (and everyone) else fails, Jesus is always there.   for that, i am thankful.

in most ways, my life has moved on. i'm engaged and preparing for marriage and family.  i have a new business.  i'm growing spiritually.  i'm not the same person i was 12 years ago when we first met and i'm thankful for that.

i met with Pastor Steph on Thursday for lunch.  she preached at STWC about a month ago and ever since then, i've been wondering about her personal testimony.  she sprinkled bits of her story in her preaching but i wanted to know the real deal.  she said that early in her salvation, she couldn't grasp ahold of the fact that she didn't have to earn God's love or His grace.  i think i'm at the same point.  i'm also at a point where i keep looking back.  i don't know why.  there's also a measure of mental and physical disobedience that i need to give up.  Bishop has been preaching that we keep wanting to flirt with corruption but it doesn't really work like that.  everytime i am deliberately disobedient, the old demons come flooding back in.  fornication brings with it depression, overeating...the whole nine.

i asked God to reveal to me what issues i have that i'm trying to pacify with these pet sins.  He told me to just stop.  there you have it.

today, i simply praise God for His blessings.

i thank Him for life.  it's moving along well.  i'm right where i need to be.

amen.